Doubt or Fear or Really Not Ready???

I signed up for the Blitzen's Revenge event with Op23ToZero.

I knew it was going to be harder than the GoRuck Light I did.

I was doing ok with training but I fell off the wagon.
I don't know why.
It snowed, I was recovering from my last long event, concern about shoes for the event, and a list of other excuses.

I have had issues every year trying to keep motivated and working out during the winter.
I am struggling again this year.
When I do make it in, I am having a problem pushing myself.
I am not quitting but I am not going 100%.

I made that commitment to do my daily affirmation.
One of those is that I will live in the present.
This event is in the future but it is causing me stress and worry.
Stress and worry is not something that is staying in the present.

But is it right that I am concerned? Stressed? Worried?

This is supposed to be a fun event.
What some see as fun is maybe beyond my max.

Am I going to be good enough to do this?

Do I go to the event and become a burden, a drag, like I did at the GoRuck Light.

Do I go?

#DFQ ???


Real Plans Recipe - Instant Pot French Onion Soup

Very simple soup.

I love a good French Onion Soup but never wanted to go thru all of the hassle that I see in the recipes.
I am also not a big fan of the wine in most of them.

So after seeing on a webpage/blog ( I can't remember where ), that you can caramelize onions in a slow cooker, I decided to try to do it in my Instant Pot.

I know this is Paleo but not sure what other specialty diets it fits.
Vegetarians "might" be able to use vegetable broth but I don't know how that would taste.

Instant Pot French Onion Soup
Servings:  4
Active Time:  20 m
Total Time:  20 m
Fixed Servings:  No


3 large onions, sweet
3 pints beef broth
2 teaspoons butter
sea salt
ground black pepper


Season: Fall, Winter
Diet Type: Traditional, Paleo
Course: Soup
Main Ingredient: Vegetable
Tags: Pressure Cooker
Cuisine: American
Dish Type: Soup/Salad

How To Prepare

1 Cut onions into rings or chunks, depending on your preference
2 Place onions into Instant Pot with butter
3 Place on Slow Cook for 12 hours
4 After 12 hours, open pot and stir
5 Add beef broth
6 Set Instant Pot to warm for 10 hours
7 Eat when you are ready and soup is hot
8 Warming cycle is just to let it develop deeper flavor
9 Add salt and pepper if you want

Notes : Many traditional recipes use wine, thyme, garlic, and bay. I made this extremely simple because I like the sweet onion and beef flavor.

URL: http://onefatguysjourneytohealth.blogspot.com/2016/12/real-plans-recipe-instant-pot-french.html


1 Year Makes So Much Difference

Last year I did the 3 Legion Ruck.
I had been training but I still had serious issues
I had to take short catch up rides and really struggled.
I basically gave up working out after this event until I started going again in April this year.

This year I was still slower than the majority of the group but I was able to basically finish.
I had to take a shuttle for last .4 miles due to being pulled by medic when my numbers started going low.
I had an orange and felt I could continue but the medic decided I should just take the shuttle to the end and rest there.
I literally was the last one on the course at this point by the time we were done checking numbers.
I wish I could have finished but there was a timing issue with the other group that I needed to be there by a certain time and I might not have made it in time.

Part of my delay was also being interviewed by the newspaper.
They asked some questions and got some pictures.
I am hoping I make it in because that would be really cool.
Here is a video they released about the event.
I am in it, as such, but only my back but you can recognize me by my pack.

I was asked multiple times about the chain I had on the back of my pack.

I felt the chain helped represent the chains that veterans with PTSD suffer from.
I am going to leave it on there for now as a way to get a conversation opener.

The pack worked a LOT better with the changes I made.
Still need a little bit of tweaking but overall it is much easier to wear and carry stuff.
And I realized with the changes I did, I can wear it over a coat or heavy gear if needed.

Today, I am a little sore, especially my calves, but I am NOT feeling crippled like I was after events earlier this year.
I got to talk to someone during the walk and I was very pleased to realize he read my blog because I respect him a lot.
He made a comment that he appreciated the end of my last blog, the part where I said I wasn't fat, I have fat but I am not defined as fat.
We talked about my journey to health and how I felt.
I am stronger, fitter, better healthy test results, able to do more, and recover faster.
I still have more to go but as long as I continue my journey I will succeed.

I decided I am going to do the Blitzen's Revenge event.
This is going to be harder than the GoRuck Light I did in July but not as hard as a GoRuck Tough.
Don't have normal winter boots but I am going to wear my Catskills mocs.
Heavy buffalo hide, I can mink oil them, wear wool socks, and should be good to go.
Will get some Yak Traks or something like that if I need more traction.
Need to make some wool pants for this.
Think I will get the viking pattern style and do those since I would use them for Viking events.

My 2017 is filling up with physical events.
I have a couple of cons but I plan on doing a lot more active events.

2017 Event Planning

Buddy Check 22K Jan 2017 20170122
Buddy Check 22K Apr 2017 20170422
Memorial Ruck 20170529
23 Hour To Stop Suicide 20170603  DATE????
24 Hour Eagle Up Ultra 20170624
GoRuck Light 20170701
Buddy Check 22K Jul 2017 20170722
Carry the Fallen Ruck 20170918
Buddy Check 22K Oct 2017 20170822



Reminder From The Past

I wrote about this 5 years ago.

Nov 09, 2011 9:32am
I have seen posts about whether you feed your evil or good wolf inside
Thinking today at the gym, while the Cybex Arc Trainer was kicking my ass, I realized that there is another pair of creatures inside me
They are nameless for me
The first is made of darkness/shame/fear/doubt/self hate/limits/sadness
The second is made of light/pride/confidence/no limits/love/happiness
Each decision feeds one, whether large like buying a house or marriage, or small like pushing your plate away when you are full but it isn't empty or taking your meds every day when you should
Each day I need to make the decisions that feed the second one
I need to acknowledge that I am making them
Getting up when I am tired and going to the gym
Using a smaller plate for food to help me control portions
Preparing meals ahead of time so I don't have to scramble and eat badly
Keeping the house clean
Choosing to chew a piece of gum instead of grabbing a piece of candy
Taking my meds and monitoring myself regularly
I have been watching Biggest Loser
Something that has clicked for me
I have decided each day will start with an affirmation
Yes, I will make good choices
Yes, I will forgive myself if I make a bad choice
Yes, I will be mindful and make choices and decisions not be mindless
Yes, I am as good as I think I am
Yes, I deserve good things
Yes, I am worth it

I have changed since then but this was a great reminder and I am going to change it to bring it current.

I have seen pictures about how everyone has 2 wolves inside them, good and evil, and depending on which you feed it will make one stronger and one weaker.

I also have 2 other forms inside me.
I don't have names or even visual forms for them.
The first is made of light/pride/confidence/no limits/love/happiness.
The second is made of darkness/shame/fear/doubt/self hate/limits/sadness.

Each day I need to make the decisions to feed the first one.
Each day I need to acknowledge those decisions.
Each day I need to decide to go to the gym or be active in some way.
Each day I need to decide to plan my meals and eat the right things.
Each day I need to decide to keep working on the house to make it what I want.
Each day I need to decide to take my meds and monitor myself on a regular basis.
Each day I need to decide to keep doing events to challenge myself.
Each day I need to decide to keep supporting the causes that mean a lot to me.

I have changed the affirmation I am going to start each day out with.
I am going to find a way to get it printed and put up on my wall.

I will make choices.
I will live my life without regrets.
I will be mindful and stay in the present.
I will forgive myself if I make a mistake.
I will remember I deserve the good things in my life.
I will remember that Yes, I Am As Good As I Think I Am.
I will remember I am worthy.



Changes and Random Thoughts


So you might have noticed I changed out my logo.
I decided I wanted to add stuff to it and also decided that NO OBSTACLE wasn't really what I wanted to say.

NO EXCUSES - means I won't use stupid, inaccurate, lying, cheating EXCUSES to not do something.
I might have a valid reason to not finish a race for example, like blisters I can't walk on or medical, but I won't accept any excuses.

NO QUITTING - means I won't just quit. I will go until I am stopped but I won't give up without giving it everything I have.
So far I am not doing any events where they can drop me for cause so it is my choice to keep going.

NO REGRETS - means I don't want to be thining 10 years from now, I wish I had done that race or event.
I have heard it said, you have more regrets from NOT doing something than you ever have from doing something you know is right.

So, I have been making changes to my pack to make it fit me better.
I am a big guy and when the pack is only 12" wide, it means that the straps have to wrap around me quite a bit.
I attached a "battle belt" to the back of the pack with rings and then built straps to connect to the front of the "battle belt".
The front of it is still near my side but that is much better for me for comfort.
I can walk for a while now without losing the feeling in my hands.
My next event will be the 3 Legion Ruck on Nov 12.
An interesting write up about the event.

A new event got created that sounds a lot like a GoRuck.
It is scheduled for Dec 17, called Blitzen's Revenge.
Veterans can do it for free and others can do it for $40.
It will be in support of Strong Compass and Operation: 23 to Zero.
10 mile ruck with exercises.
It is a TEAM event so as long as you #DFQ, they will help get you thru it.
I need better winter gear for it if I am going to do it tho.

I finished my next virtual race with Yes.Fit.
Route 66 is done, a 66 mile run.
My next one is Pacific Coast Highway, 113 mile event.

So I was thinking while walking that I could do better if I wasn't fat.
Then I thought about it more.

I AM NOT FAT!!!!!!!!!!

I have too much fat on me but I AM NOT FAT.

I am a man.
I am 51 years old.
I am about 5' 9".

I have too much fat on me but I AM NOT FAT.

FAT doesn't describe what I am, it describes an aspect of me.



A New LOW !!!

Just got some medical tests back.
For the first time in the history that I have available in MyChart, my triglycerides are below 200.
They should be below 150 but when they have been over 1200, this is awesome.

ComponentYour ValueStandard Range
CHOLESTEROL,TOTAL150 mg/dL100 - 199 mg/dL
TRIGLYCERIDES196 mg/dL<150 mg/dL
HDL CHOLESTEROL42 mg/dL>40 mg/dL
NON-HDL CHOLESTEROL108 mg/dl<145 mg/dl
CHOL/HDL RATIO3.57  <4.50
LDL CHOLESTEROL69 mg/dL<=130 mg/dL

As a comparison, this was my last results in March of this year.
ComponentYour ValueStandard Range
CHOLESTEROL,TOTAL194 mg/dL100 - 199 mg/dL
TRIGLYCERIDES745 mg/dL<150 mg/dL
HDL CHOLESTEROL30 mg/dL>40 mg/dL
NON-HDL CHOLESTEROL164 mg/dl<145 mg/dl
CHOL/HDL RATIO6.47  <4.50
Invalid LDL when Trig >400.

What am I doing?
I have been working out fairly regularly since April.
I have upped my fish oil Omega 3 to 4,000 units a day.
I try very hard to NOT use artificial fats, I use butter, olive oil, meat fats (bacon).

Excited to see what they will be next time.

My A1c went back up a bit but still under 7 so very controlled.
Rest of my bloodwork was great.
So, with my meds as they are, as long as I keep doing what I have been doing, I am a lot healthier than I have been in a while.
Still too much fat on me but as long as the rest of my numbers stay good, I can keep going.

Finally got back on the treadmill after my Buddy Check 22K.
I developed a blister on the side of my right heel.
It was kind of painful to do much walking on and I didn't want to aggravate it.
I also didn't want to pop it since it was right on the callous line and I was afraid it would break off and mess up my heel.

Debating on whether to set a distance goal or time goal on the treadmill.
I can set a mile or so goal or 30 minutes.
I think a lot depends on whether I want to do a lot of lifting or just a small amount.
I am not doing the 1 hour walk since I want to do some lifting every day, whether it is squat, bench, curls, etc.
I am doing some stomach work every day.

Need to figure out what to do for my legs on my Nov ruck.
I need to prevent myself from sweating so much I get cold.
I don't need a lot of warmth as such but don't want the cold.



First One in the Books

Saturday, 20161022, I completed my Buddy Check 22K.
This was 22 kilometers, 4 loops around Cleary Park in Prior Lake.

I had 2 people that joined me, Elsolel and LaceMaker.
Both of them walked with me on the first loop.
Elsolel took the 2nd and 3rd loop to get food and do base station stuff to help support me.
LaceMaker was able to modify her plans and walk with me for those 2 loops.
LaceMaker had to go do some other stuff and Elsolel walked the last loop with me.
I was very near tears when Elsolel put the Stop 22 medal around my neck.

The first loop was actually my hardest.
I was wearing pants with a belt and I wasn't used to that.
It was causing pressure issues that I wasn't used to.
I also needed to use the bathroom.
I went before I left but got serious cramps during the loop and had no way to go.

The 2nd and 3rd loop weren't too bad.
We had lunch between those 2 so it helped to stop and get some food in me.
Had another snack after the 3rd before the 4th and final loop.
Soup worked well but want to maybe do some soup that isn't as heavy next time.
Home made chicken and rice might be really good.
Might have to carry warm thermos of chicken broth for the event in Jan.

Items to note for next events.

  • Find cold weather leg gear.
  • Get more of the black socks that worked best, both other white pairs had blister issues.
  • Look at changing underwear to reduce chafing.
  • Find good body glide type material to reduce chafing.
  • Work on getting waist belt for pack to help relieve pressure on shoulders.
  • Get more velcro on bag for more patches.

I have 4 more already scheduled and want to really try to make them bigger.
If anyone knows how to get race medals made or something like that it would be awesome.
Elsolel and I are thinking about an embroidery machine so could maybe make patches.
SUN JAN 22, 2017
SAT APR 22, 2017
SAT JUL 22, 2017
SUN OCT 22, 2017

Still waiting for the dates to be set for the 23 Hours to Stop Suicide event at Lutsen next year.
Depending on when they do it, it might only be 2 weeks before the Eagle Up Ultra.

Besides these, I think I have talked myself into driving down for the Eagle Up Ultra.
I have to carry a 22lb ruck for up to 24 hours, depending on what I can do.
The 2 goals I could hit are 50 km and 50 miles.
I am not sure I could hit the 100 km mark but if I make 50 miles and would have time to make it, I will try.
Now to figure out the money for this and get signed up by the end up November before the price goes up.

Need to get signed up to do the GoRuck Light on July 1st in St Paul.
In order to succeed at it, I will need to train a lot harder for the welcome party.
If I can come out of that not smoked, I will be good.
I want to, at a minimum, to carry my own weight during the event.
The first one, I had to have help even carrying my own weight, let alone, carrying the team weight.

I also plan on getting revenge on the Carry the Fallen White Bear Lake event.
I made mistakes and wasn't able to complete that one fully and want to go back and finish that.
After doing my Buddy Check 22K, I know I can do it.

Question for anyone still reading my blog, Do you know of any other sites like Yes.Fit that have virtual races but for longer distances, not just 5k/10k/13.1mi/26.2mi?
Looking for other race medals for longer type events.
Even some ultra runs that have equivalent virtual distances that I can complete as I can.



Another Virtual Race Medal

So I finished my 2nd long virtual race.
This one was the Viking Challenge on Yes.Fit.
It was an accumulation of 65.3 miles.

It took me weeks to complete it but I am fine with that.

I have walked more since April training for various events than I have in several years before that.

This Saturday I am doing my Buddy Check 22K event.
I set it up to go with my Buddy Check that I do every month.
I will do 4 loops at Cleary Park.
When I finish, Elsolel will give me this medal that I signed up for as a virtual 1/2 marathon thru Virtual Strides, the Stop 22 race.

This is one that I know will push me.
I will be carrying 22 lbs of weight in my ruck besides my water.

Anyone contemplating suicide, please check in with someone.
Suicide doesn't make the pain go away, it just moves that pain to someone else.
I know I speak a lot about veterans and PTSD but know that it isn't just veterans I care about.

Some resources:
Stop Soldier Suicide - https://www.facebook.com/stopsoldiersuicide
American Foundation for Suicide Prevention - https://www.facebook.com/AFSPnational
Battle Buddy - https://www.facebook.com/FIGHT.THE.DARK
Odin's Operators - https://www.facebook.com/odinsop
Operation Enduring Warrior - https://www.facebook.com/EnduringWarrior
Operation 23 To Zero - https://www.facebook.com/op2320
Carry The Fallen - https://www.facebook.com/CarryTheFallen
Υ Σ Μ Χ - https://www.facebook.com/Fraternal.order
Veterans Crisis Line - http://www.veteranscrisisline.net/
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline - http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

These are numbers of crisis resources for Vets.
If you are in dire need 911
1-800-273-8255 for Vets press 1
1-800-273-8255 if you feel suicidal
1-800-342-9647 is the number for military one source call them and they will help to build you a plan
1-866-966-1020 Defense ctr for excellence
1-800-984-8523 Wounded Soldier and Family Hotline
421-3700 DSN
312-421-3700 OCONUS DSN


How Do I Measure MY Success???

Questions I contemplated on the treadmill today.

How do I measure my success? When I am good enough? When I have given enough?

What do I do if it doesn't seem like I am getting closer to some of my goals?
What if my goals aren't appropriate?

How do I measure my success? When I am good enough? When I have given enough?
I used to think it was by the scale because that was what everyone asks, how much do you weigh.
I realized that wasn't ever going to be a good answer since I will ALWAYS weigh too much according to the modern standards and the stupid BMI.

So I tossed my scales.
Well actually I put them in my storage unit since they were really good ones and might come in handy at some point in the future.

Then I started taking measurements and pictures.
But that depressed me.
It is depressing me since it doesn't seem like it is moving.
Others might tell me that I am looking better but I DON'T SEE IT.
It is like watching glaciers move.
You can see the change but not right away.
You need to track it over a long time.
I feel "tighter" at times but measurements don't carry that thru.
I also don't know how big I was when I was at my biggest.

So I decided I need to use more performance based for progress and success.
I don't expect to be able to improve a LOT in a short time but I do have old performance records.
I can tell if I am doing the same or if I am doing better than older records.
An example was in my last post.
Today, I had 45 minutes on the treadmill and almost got 2 miles in that time, with my pack on.

Way more sweaty than normal too.
Looking back, that is faster than I have done before so I am happy.

Now what about goals?
What do I do if it doesn't seem like I am getting closer to some of my goals?
What if my goals aren't appropriate?

Right now, I don't have any true goals as such.
I know I want to keep moving and I have been.
I know I am improving so that is good.
I suppose my only goals for the most part are revenge goals.
I want revenge on the GoRuck Light that I struggled thru.
I want revenge on the Carry The Fallen – White Bear Lake, MN where I wasn't used to the weight and cramped up and had to get a ride.
I want to complete 25 miles in the 23 Hours To End Suicide event at Lutsen.

And one that isn't a revenge goal but keeps coming back to my brain is the 24 Eagle Up Ultra.
It has distance marks of 100 mile, 100 Km, 50 mile, and 50 Km.
There is a rucking category even (20 lb min in ruck).
That is going to cost money to join and get to so still deciding if I am going to go for it.

There are things I need to do in order to accomplish these tasks and I have been doing most of them.
I need to do more "Welcome Party" type exercises to handle the GoRuck better, more HIIT stuff.
More like XFit intensity but I can't afford to do XFit.
I need to plan and execute a meal plan better, and build in interruption handling so if I am late from work, I can still do something healthy.

I know doing more activity will help me lose weight and size which will help in these tasks but I can't concentrate on those or I start to lose momentum when I don't see progress.

Winter is Coming!!!!!!
Winter has been my achilles heel for a LONG time.
I get bad about doing gym and staying active.
I really need to make this a priority this winter.



Challenge Finished Next Already Started

Today was a good day in several ways.
I finished my Virtual Race from Yes.Fit.
I had been doing the Viking Conquest challenge.
Finished it at the gym this morning.
65.3 miles on that one.

My next one is Route 66 and is actually 66 miles.
Next weekend I am going to get a good boost to it because I am doing my Buddy Check 22k at Cleary Park in Prior Lake.

I am publicly making a goal of finishing this by Nov 11.
I want to be done in time for the 3 Legion Ruck on the 12th of Nov.
At that point I want to start the Pacific Coast Highway challenge.
That is 113.2 miles.

I am 65.57 into my Amerithon Challenge.
My team, 3 of us so far signed up, is at 155.97.

Tuesday I really wasn't feeling to energetic in the evening and felt I needed to take Wednesday off.
I got over 9 hours of sleep and felt a LOT better yesterday, both mentally and physically.
Today on the treadmill I decided to do a lower incline but push the speed.
I was fairly close to doing 3 miles in 1 hour at 2% incline.
I also had my pack on so was carrying 33lbs.
I did have to deal with a bit of cramping but it was manageable.

I also started using the Charity Miles App.
You start the app on your phone, choose a charity, and a portion of the corporate donations go to that charity.
It is really kind of cool to know that walking can also send money to a charity.

My work was awesome.
My boss told me good job instead of complaining when I was a little bit late back from the gym for work this morning.
Means a lot when they encourage you instead of complaining.
I am salary and expected to work late if needed so being a bit late isn't really a big deal and I didn't miss a meeting.
It is nice to have that environment to work in.

On FB for the last several weeks, I have started doing Positive Train Posts on Wednesday.
I pick some of my friends from my friends list and say something good about them and how they have influenced me or encouraged me.
I have yet to be able to post those 8 or 10 posts without getting emotional.
I truly believe that they are appreciated by those listed and hopefully make their life better.
I encourage you to try something like it.
Publicly or privately, if you want, tell them that they are appreciated.
You might be surprised how many agree with you if you do publicly post.
And to be honest, it feels good for me to do it and that is the great part.


WOW - FitBit

I was just looking at the totals on the FitBit website dashboard.
18 months since I got my FitBit, records from May 2015 to today.

1,988,503 steps
3032 floors
898.12 miles
1,997,718 calories

All in 18 months.

Needless to say I am shocked.
I had no clue.




I went to the gym this morning to work out.
When I got there, I couldn't get in because the computer that controls the chip reader was down.

I told Elsolel I needed to go to the gym after work.
I finished at 4 today and at 4:40 I realized I was letting myself get distracted by other things and I hadn't gone yet.

Headed out to the gym.

Did a full hour on the treadmill which I haven't done in the morning recently because I had gotten out of the habit of being up early.
Then did some squats and farmer's carries.

Then I got to thinking about my progress.
Below are 2 pictures of workouts.

This one is from April 2016. 
One of my first workouts.

This is a picture of today's workout, Oct 2016.

The numbers in today's walk are a bit better, I don't feel as drained as I did then, and the biggest difference is that today's walk I was carrying a 32lb ruck.

I still have a long way to go as far as getting in shape but I think this is great proof to myself that

I have a 22k schedule for Oct 22 at Cleary Park.
I am honestly not worried about doing that distance.
For those that don't know, that is a bit more than a 1/2 marathon.

I just have to keep going.


No Change But That Is Good

I have been dealing with dental surgery and being sick.
This has really put a crimp into getting into the gym.

I finally got back in this week.
Weighed myself.
I am not too worried about it, just use it as a general guide.
I was the same as before my time off so hope that is a good thing.

Monday on the treadmill I found out that the ring on my hydration bladder wasn't all the way down.
Not something I knew to check.
It then leaked G2 into my pack while on the treadmill.

Got to the gym again on Wednesday but I was slow to get up so only got in a 30 min walk in.

Changed up my alarm to start getting up a bit earlier.
I tend to have a better day if I can take a little bit of time to wake up.
If I can wake up a bit slower I tend to be a bit more relaxed.

So I have 2 walks coming up.
Oct 22, looks like Operation 23 To Zero is doing an event.
Still looking for details on it.

Then November 12 Operation 23 To Zero is going the 3 Legion Ruck.
Last year we tried to go from Fairbault to Waseca.
We stopped at Morristown for lunch but only made it about 15 miles when we ran out of daylight for safety.
This year, they are starting 1 group from Fairbault and the other from Waseca with both meeting in Morristown.
Lunch and speakers at the VFW.
Let me know if you want to join us.


Real Plans Recipe - Hearty Crab Salad

Elsolel and I enjoy this hearty crab salad.
It uses cabbage to bulk it out and make it more filling.

Hearty Crab Salad

Servings:  4
Active Time:  10 m
Total Time:  10 m
Fixed Servings:  No

8 ounces shredded cabbages
1 can albacore tuna
1 can Crab, chopped
1 package lump crabmeat
1/2 cup mayo
sea salt
Old Bay Seasoning
ground pepper
Ground garlic

Season: Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter
Diet Type: Traditional, Paleo, Primal
Course: Entree/Main Course
Main Ingredient: Shellfish
Cuisine: American
Dish Type: Make Ahead

How To Prepare
2 Chop the crab legs into small chunks
3 Drain tuna and crab
5 Place shredded cabbage, tuna, crab legs, chopped crab, and mayo into bowl and stir.
6 Add salt, Old Bay Seasoning, pepper, and garlic to taste.

Notes : 
I use the packaged imitation legs versus the chunk since it cuts up easier.
You might use more mayo, I never truly measure, just mix until I like it.

Url : http://onefatguysjourneytohealth.blogspot.com/2016/09/real-plans-recipe-hearty-crab-salad.html



Elsolel and I are signed up to do the Warrior 196 5k event next weekend.
Next weekend is also the annual Carry the Fallen White Bear Lake ruck.
The CTF ruck is the one that kicked my butt last year.

So my conundrum is that I want to do both but they happen at the same time.

I want revenge on that course that beat me last year.
Please understand, I did ok, especially considering the training I had done.
But I didn't finish the entire thing on my own.
I had to get help with a ride between stops.

I want to go back and beat it.
I want to finish with my pack.
I want to stand tall and finish on my own.

But if I do that, then Elsolel can't do it with me.
Also, I paid to participate in the Warrior 196 and endorse what they are doing.

Have to keep thinking about that.

Also, for those that haven't seen me posting this before, I am doing the AFSP walk on Sept 18 with Elsolel.
Trying to raise money for that.

Real Plans Recipe - Thick Chili

My favorite recipe for thick chili.

Servings:  4
Active Time:  10 m
Total Time:  8 h 30 m
Fixed Servings:  No

2 pounds ground beef, 93%
1 pound bacon, (ends and pieces or cut slices)
1 pound andouille sausage
1 bag frozen stir fry peppers
2 cans tomatoes, with diced green chiles
1 can tomato, with garlic and onion
1 can tomato paste, (small)
1 onion
sea salt
ground pepper
4 tablespoons ground cumin, (I use a LOT in mine)
chipotle pepper, smoked ground
smoked paprika


Season: Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter
Diet Type: Traditional, Paleo, Primal
Course: Entree/Main Course
Main Ingredient: Beef
Tags: Food Processor, Slow Cooker/Crock Pot
Cuisine: American
Dish Type: Big Cook Day

How To Prepare

2 Dice onion small
3 Chop peppers (I use a quick blast in food processor)
5 In a large fry pan cook the bacon
6 In a 6 QT crock pot
7 Cook ground beef and andouille sausage with cumin and paprika
8 Add diced onion and peppers
9 Add bacon
10 Cook for a bit and then add all the tomatoes
11 Lower heat and let cook on low for 6-8 hours
12    Add spices to taste

Notes :
You can do this on stove top if you want.
You just have to cook it long enough to cook the tomatoes enough to get rid of the canned taste.
You will literally be able to stand your spoon up in this chili.

Url : http://onefatguysjourneytohealth.blogspot.com/2016/09/real-plans-recipe-thick-chili.html

Real Plans Recipe - Jalapeno Sausage Chix Thighs Sweet Potato and Kale Soup

Using up some of the Bare Naked Chicken Thighs I got a Mazopiya.

Servings:  4
Active Time:  10 m
Total Time:  25 m
Fixed Servings:  No

1 pound Sausage , (Jalapeño)
1 package chicken thigh, (I use Bare Naked Boneless Skinless)
2 sweet potatoes
2 cups chopped kale
1 onion
1 quart water
2 teaspoons chickens, bullion
sea salt, to taste
ground pepper, to taste
garlic, to taste

Season: Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter
Diet Type: Traditional, Paleo, Primal
Course: Soup
Main Ingredient: Chicken
Cuisine: American
Dish Type: Soup/Salad

How To Prepare
2 Cut sausage into small pieces (remove skin if you can)
3 Cut chicken thighs into bite size pieces
4 Cube sweet potato
5 Chop kale if not already chopped
6 Rough dice onion

7 In a 5 qt pot cook the onion, chicken and sausage.
8 Once complete add water, bullion, sweet potatoes.
9 Cook for 10 min.
10 Add chopped kale.
11 Cook for 5 min.
12 Spice with salt, pepper, and garlic to taste.

Url : http://onefatguysjourneytohealth.blogspot.com/2016/09/real-plans-recipe-jalapeno-sausage-chix.html


Real Plans Recipe - Kraut Burgers Using Soda Bread

These made my mom jealous.
Based on the Kraut Burger Mix that originated from my grand mother.
I would like to think she would really enjoy this version.

Servings:  4
Active Time:  10 m
Total Time:  10 m
Fixed Servings:  No


3 cups Kraut Burger Mix instructions referenced in Notes Kraut Burger Mix
2 cups all-purpose flour
2 tablespoons white sugar
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/4 teaspoon Salt
1/4 cup butter, softened (lard works)
1/2 cup buttermilk
1 egg, only 0.50 needed but I prefer full egg
2 teaspoons melted butter


Season: Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter
Diet Type: Traditional
Course: Entree/Main Course
Main Ingredient: Beef
Cuisine: American
Dish Type: Wildcard

How To Prepare

1 Reserve the Kraut Burger Mix and melted butter for now
2 Mix all of the dry ingredients
3 Slowly add softened butter and buttermilk and mix
4 Lightly knead once it all forms a ball
5 The more you work the dough, the tougher it will be.
6 Take a portion sized between a golf ball and a tennis ball and work flat with hands or roll out
7 Place 3 or 4 heaping TBsp of the Kraut Burger Mix in the middle (adjust to fit your dough size)
8 Wrap edges of dough over and seal all the way around
9 Continue with the rest of the dough
10 Preheat oven to 375ºF
11 Place on Sil Pat seam side down
12 Lightly brush the tops of each with the melted butter
13 Once all are prepared, put in the oven
14 Set timer for 15 minutes
15 After 15 minutes flip over and cook for an additional 5-10 minutes until you get some browning.
16 You can apply more melted butter if you want.
17 Serve immediately

Notes :
Kraut Burger Mix: http://onefatguysjourneytohealth.blogspot.com/2016/08/real-plans-recipe-kraut-burger-mix.html
Original Soda Bread Recipe: http://allrecipes.com/recipe/16947/amazingly-easy-irish-soda-bread
These should freeze but I haven't experimented with that yet.

Url : http://onefatguysjourneytohealth.blogspot.com/2016/08/real-plans-recipe-kraut-burgers-using.html

Real Plans Recipe - Hamburger Sausage Sweet Potato Kale Soup

An experiment that worked well for me.

Servings:  4
Active Time:  10 m
Total Time:  30 m
Fixed Servings:  No


1 1/2 pounds hamburger
1 pound hot sausage
1 lg onion, (diced)
2 sweet potatoes, (cubed)
2 cups chopped kale
2 teaspoons beef, bullion
garlic powder, to taste
chipotle pepper, )
sea salt, to taste
ground pepper, to taste
liquid smoke, to taste (optional)


Season: Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter
Diet Type: Traditional, Paleo, Primal
Course: Soup
Main Ingredient: Beef
Cuisine: American
Dish Type: Soup/Salad

How To Prepare

1 Prep
2 Dice onion
3 Cube sweet potatoes
4 In a 5 Qt pot
5 Cook burger and sausage meat.
6 Add onions while cooking.
7 Add garlic, salt, pepper and smoke (optional)
8 Drain meat and hold for now.
9 Put in 4-6 cups water (I started with 4 then added some to cover)
10 Add beef bullion.
11 Add sweet potatoes and cook 10 minutes and then add meat back in.
12 Simmer 5 minutes then add kale.
13 Simmer 5 more minutes.
14 Final spicing to taste.

Notes : The chopped kale is small and cooks fast, even the stems. Larger pieces might take longer to cook.

Url : http://onefatguysjourneytohealth.blogspot.com/2016/08/real-plans-recipe-hamburger-sausage.html

Real Plans Recipe - Overnight Onion Sausage Kale Soup

This recipe is based on what you have to do for French Onion Soup.
I didn't realize I needed way more onions for that so just modified what I was doing to make this.

By cooking the onions overnight in crock pot you get an extremely deep brown color and very rich flavor and they don't burn.

Cook for:    2
Original Servings:  2
Active Time:  20 m
Total Time:  40 m
Fixed Servings:  No


2 pounds sweet onion
1 pound Spicy sausage
4 cups kale, diced or minced
1 tablespoon beef, bullion
garlic powder, to taste
sea salt and ground black pepper, to taste

How To Prepare

1 Brown sausage, drain, and store overnight in refrigerator
2 Dice onion
3 Put onion in crock pot with beef bullion, and a little bit of salt, pepper, and garlic powder
4 Cover with water
5 Let cook overnight
6 Next morning add the cooked sausage
7 Add water to cover
8 Let cook rest of day
9 When you get home from work, add chopped/diced kale to crock pot and turn up to high
10 Add water to cover
11 After 15-20 minutes check for flavor and add final spices

Notes : I buy frozen chopped kale from Woodstock and my local organic store. It comes in 3lb bag and works well.


Season: Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter
Diet Type: Traditional, Paleo
Course: Entree/Main Course
Main Ingredient: Pork
Tags: Slow Cooker/Crock Pot
Cuisine: American
Dish Type: Soup/Salad

Timeline Instructions: Add onions to crock pot for Overnight Onion Sausage Kale Soup (4) Cook sausage and store for Overnight Onion Sausage Kale Soup (4) Add cooked sausage to crock pot for Overnight Onion Sausage Kale Soup (2)


Real Plans Recipe - Kraut Burger Mix

I signed up for Real Plans and have really liked it.
I have really only done it for 1 week as I had to go in to work all week this week and got put up in a hotel.

The only problem I have had with it so far is that life happens and I don't get to cook what I had on my plan and then I have extra stuff.
But since I have only fully planned 1 week, I know I can tune that in and build in some "gaps" for left overs and missed meals.

I am going to try to post recipes so that people can import them if they like them.
This is my first attempt so please let me know if it works for you.

Kraut Burger Mix
(Think Runza type mix)

Servings:  4
Active Time:  10 m
Total Time:  40 m
Fixed Servings:  No

3 pounds ground beef
2 bags shredded cabbages, I use Fresh Express 3 color coleslaw
3 cans sauerkraut, (I mix regular and sweet)
1 med onion
sea salt and ground black pepper, to taste
garlic, (optional)
How To Prepare

1 Place burger in 5Qt pot and start browning. (Bigger if you have it)
2 Dice onion and put in with burger until cooked.
3 Drain mixture and keep on side.
4 Put pot back on stove.
5 Add 1 bag shredded cabbage.
6 Add 1 1/2 can sauerkraut
7 Add 1/2 burger on top.
8 Repeat with remaining ingredients.
9 Adjust heat to low and let cook for 30 minutes.
Notes : Can be put into bread to make a "Runza".

Season: Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter
Diet Type: Traditional, Paleo
Course: Entree/Main Course
Main Ingredient: Beef
Cuisine: Continental European
Dish Type: Wildcard


5 Weeks After

It has been 5 weeks since I did my GoRuck.
I took some time off working out hard after the event to recover.
My elbows scabbed up good and finally healed but left discoloration that may be scars.

Some really good news for all the training.
My A1c was down to 6.3.
Lowest it has ever been.
Right at the border for a normal person.
I think due to the time off from working out, it will go back up but not badly.

It was hard to get back into the groove of going to the gym after taking some time off.
This has ALWAYS been my problem if I stop going.

Part of not going were things like going out of town for 5 days and a 4 day working staycation.

One of the things I did after finishing my ruck was to order a GR1 from GoRuck.
It is designed to be used for rucking and daily use.
It has a "bomb proof" pocket for laptops that works well for carrying a ruck plate.

I have used it without the plate a couple of times with just my 3 liter hydration bag.
Elsolel and I used it on a 5k walking event.
I used it to carry clothes and stuff on our vacation.
I figure I will use it for daily use and for transporting my laptop to and from work.

Well yesterday I finally got back into the gym.
Wore my ruck to the gym with my 20lb plate in it.

30 min on treadmill with avg 4% incline
100 air squats with pack on
100 flutter kicks while benching my pack
100 pull overs with pack between flutter kick sets
Farmers carry 3 laps of gym with 35lb kettle bells

Had one guy come up to me as he was leaving and give me a high five
"I like the way you are working out dude. Keep it up."
Made me feel good
He had been doing some serious body weight stuff himself.

Legs are a bit sore and I feel like I have to be careful on stairs.
Like my legs might give out.
Was worse last night but doing a bit better today.

Plan on going back to the gym on Sunday morning.
Some of the same workout items but figure I will change it out some.
Might check out the Jacobs Ladder, it seems kind of like a bear crawl.

Does anyone have any other ideas for body weight or stuff with my pack?


Again Disappointed and Satisfied

July 2nd I went out for the GoRuck Light.

I made it to the end and got my patch.
Replaced my Embrace the Suck one.
Have to add more velcro to get it back on there tho.

There were a total of 44 people and our Cadre Matt S.

The welcome party had me doubting my decision to even do the event.
Speed movements as a group, burpees, push ups, flutter kicks, and benching our packs.
Trying to manage my pump, my pack straps, and for that matter my shorts, was a pain.
I was having problems catching my breath.
Took a real shot to my confidence.
I knew I could go 16+ miles on a ruck cross country but this was so very different.
I immediately got support and encouragement and kept going.

Our first major obstacle that seemed to really trash me were stairs.
I know that LOTS of squats and box jumps are in my future for training.
Lots of people gave me encouragement, introduced themselves (I don't remember names, sorry), and told me to keep going.
I was having problems even standing.
My quads were screaming at me and my legs were shaking so bad I just wanted to sit and rest.
At this point, someone was actually carrying my pack for me.

The team had picked up Big Bertha, a really long log, and was team carrying it.
Yes, if you are paying attention, that means that not only were some carrying the team weight, a lot were on the log, and someone was actually carrying my weight.
I was drinking from my nalgene bottle that I had with me.

We made it to a water stop and I refilled my bottle and checked my sugars.
I was doing ok but didn't really have time to rest.
When we took off, I didn't make it far before I needed help with my pack again.

We moved down to some steps and had a time hack to get up and down them while yelling out the different branches of service.
Yes, more steps and my legs were toast.
Everyone else had packs, someone even had mine, and I was struggling.
I didn't stop but I was in serious pain.

They moved me to the front and had me carry the flag and set the pace.
We moved down to a flag memorial for some team pictures.

From there we moved towards a hill.
Then we got to pay honor to the troops and low crawl about 100 yards across a field and up the small hill.
I was still on the flag so was doing lunges.
Part way across the field, someone took the flag from me and I got to do the low crawl.
The grass was fairly dry and I was still having a hard time so it was not a fun event.
I made it but managed to really tear up my arms.
I didn't realize just how bad until later.

Then we got to move down to the river for some water calisthenics.
Those weren't too bad but that water was definitely not something I want to be in much.
Squats, burpees, surfed one of the females, and a lot of flutter kicks.
Back into our packs, someone carrying mine, and up for some more pics.
We got to leave Big Bertha there.

Then we went into an indian run.
The team weight and flag were passed from person to person back to the end of the line and then they were run back to the front.
While I carried the flag someone else carried the team weight.

We then moved back to the bridge to get back on the correct side of the river.
At that point we had casualties.
I took my pack back since we were down people and I knew I had to carry it.
I was up front with the flag to set the pace.
We were moving very slow and had stops to let people swap out positions on the carries.
Every time we got too spaced out, we took more casualties.

Eventually we made it to back down to the stairs we jumped up on the way out.
I used the rail the entire way and made it down.

Then Cadre Matt wanted a jog.
I didn't have one in me but kept going.

We made it back to the opening field.
Tunnel of love and you got your patch at the end.
I got told to do lunges, this might be due to my size or my condition, not sure which.
My problem with lunges was my thighs were already so trashed and the end of the tunnel kept moving away from me.
Eventually I caught up to the end and was patched.
Cadre told me to go get the flag, which was being held by a bystander.

Once everyone was patched Cadre had his final words.

In my final summary:

I am struggling to be satisfied.
I never quit but I didn't succeed and that is a serious failing I have to accept finishing.

Cadre Matt S kept pushing me but didn't try to break me which he could have.

There is no way that I would have done this without 43 team mates.
At no point, EVER, did I hear anyone say anything to me about causing them to work harder or that I should quit and let them move on without me.
I can honestly say that I have never felt as supported by any group as I did during the ruck.
As long as I didn't quit, they weren't going to quit on me or let me quit.

GoRuck had a sale on a pack, that included another ruck.
I will do another one.
I want to finish one and not be the guy that had to be carried.
I now know that I can keep going and know more of what I have to train for.
Next year.



I have been training for a GoRuck Light on July 2nd.

My friend that was going to come up and do it with me just let me know she suffered an injury and won't make it.

I have been having serious doubts and fears that I will be able to complete it.
That I will be able to carry my own share of the event and not be a drag on the team.

I have been giving serious thought to sending an email and telling them I can't do it and postpone my event until a later one.
I really want to do that.

Because I don't know that I can do it.
Because I don't know that I am in shape for it.
Because I am SCARED.

I really want to complete it but I am scared that I will try and fail.
That I will be told that I am not good enough to complete the event.
That I will be embarrassed and humiliated for not making it.

It scares me enough that I have been stressing a LOT about it.

I was talking to someone about the music I listen to and I mentioned that one of my favorite songs was "Live Like You Were Dying"
This is one of those things that I need to do.

I need to do a new one.
I need to add NO REGRET.

As I was thinking about all of this, I remembered this quote:
It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.
Theodore Roosevelt, "Man in the Arena" Speech given April 23, 1910

It just boils down to a couple things.
I need to let go of the fear of failure.
I need to let go of the fear of not being good enough.

As the Spartans used to say, Η ΤΑΝ Η ΕΠΙ ΤΑΣ
Ή τάν ή επί τάς (I tan i epi tas): "This, or on this"

That is all I can do, my best, and either be victorious or go down trying.
Valhalla isn't populated with those that postponed their trials.


Motivation for the Long Run

I have tried multiple times to lose weight.
Anyone that has read this blog for any length of time has seen that.

I have tried various diet programs.
I have tried various workouts.
I have done a lot of things.

The one thing I haven't done, is stick with it.
I will do it for a while and then I either lose heart or I hurt myself trying to do too much.

At this point, I have been working out for a couple of months.
I can feel myself wanting to make excuses.
I can tell I am finding it harder to get up in time to get to the gym.
It is easier to make excuses and not get up.

I have a GoRuck on July 2.
I am still working out for it but even with that as motivation, I am struggling to keep going.

I have also not gotten a good meal plan going.
I need to plan out stuff more and shop for that.

I need to find something to help keep me motivated and going until I get the momentum to not stop.


I hear you but I am not sure I believe you

My girlfriend, Elsolel, keeps telling me I am awesome.
I have family and others telling me that I am doing a good job.
The manager at the gym commented that it looked like I had lost weight.
My doctor was pleased that my A1c was the lowest it had been in years.

I hear all of this but still struggle to internalize it.
To believe that I am good enough.
That I am doing a good job.
That I am making progress and all the work I am doing is worth it.

As a US Marine veteran, I have an extremely self confident core belief in myself.
I climbed Mount Mother F*cker.
I have been thru some seriously bad stuff.
I walked thru the valley and came out the other side, beaten, damaged, but I made it thru.
I have an absolute belief in myself.

I have a phrase that I made up (as such) a LONG time ago
Yes I Am As Good As I Think I Am

But I still doubt myself at times.
I still doubt my worth at times.

You know what?
It is perfectly fine for me to doubt myself at times.
I won't dwell in the doubt.
I won't wallow in self pity.

I see that I have doubt, I acknowledge those feelings, and I move on.
Feelings are real.
I know that I have to deal with them or they will fester.

Will I ever be able to join the solid core inner belief in myself with my minds self doubting & self criticizing part into a solid non doubting combination?
I don't know.
I just know that I will keep moving on.

You never know when the Gods are watching.
You never know when someone that is on the ragged edge of quitting life completely will see you and say, "Because of that person, I will give it another try. I will go another day."
You may never know when your actions can inspire someone to not quit.

I will do my best to always live my life in honor.
I will do my best to always live my life as an inspiration just in case.